RECAP: "Sparrow"- Being Mary Jane S3, E3

Last night's episode of Being Mary Jane was HEAVY! Picking up from last week's season three premiere, the episode starts with Lisa having what seems, at first, like a typical night. She makes herself dinner, takes a shower, before putting on a nice nightgown. In a very calm and weirdly happy manner, though, she slowly takes a bunch of pills with wine, committing suicide! Afterwards, Mary Jane gets a call from David, but ignores him and deletes his number from her phone. He eventually shows up at her house, but she's already at work. Niecy calls MJ asking her to come over, as David tells the Pattersons what happened to Lisa. Niecy ends up telling Mary Jane over the phone, as Helen cries and Paul sits in shock.

That same night, Mary Jane looks through all of the calls she's been ignoring since her accident. She comes across all the ignored calls from Lisa too, including Friday, which I'm assuming, may have been the day (or close to it) that Lisa killed herself.

Later, Kara comes to visit Mary Jane, along with Mark and Nichelle, and they all reflect on memories about Lisa. Mary Jane takes matters into her own hands, planning the funeral service. Nichele reveals that David is actually the one who found Lisa, which prompts Mary Jane to have an actual conversation with him, albeit short and awkward.

The next day, Mary Jane goes to see her parents, with Helen believing that they played a part in Lisa's death by ignoring her. Mary Jane seems very numb, as she focuses on planning the funeral. Helen told Lisa's family what happened, which upsets Mary Jane since Lisa hadn't spoken to them in 15 years, and, for good reason, as we find out later on. MJ then goes to Lisa's house and sees Lisa's last dinner on the table, still in a sense of shock and numbness. At that moment, Lisa's mother and stepfather arrive, and, by the little details, it's clear that MJ had a stronger connection with Lisa than they did. Mary Jane refuses to have the stepfather Charles at the funeral, and states that she will not be there if he is, implying something happened specifically between the two of them. Lisa's mother later states that she lied to the family about what happened to Lisa, and that people will talk if Mary Jane doesn't come. She doesn't want a scene, so she asks Charles not to come, which he agrees to. Seems like she doesn't even care that her daughter is dead, instead worrying about what people will think. 

Right before the funeral at the end of the episode, Mary Jane and David talk, and she reveals that she finally broke down and cried the night before. Instead of writing her eulogy, she spent time picking out a dress for the funeral, and oddly got this bad pain in her chest before finally crying for hours, It was because the dress she picked, Lisa had told her not to buy because it was too expensive. That was the one of the last times they went shopping together and spend real time together as friends, and now Mary Jane is giving the eulogy at Lisa's funeral. It's all really sad to watch and think about.  David struggles to find the right thing to say, but encourages MJ, stating her eulogy will be great. He also tells her that Lisa's death is not her fault, which, understandably, she gets angry at. For one thing, you don't say that to somebody, especially on the day that she has to bury a friend she's had from childhood. Mary Jane is angry at him implying that it was her fault, instead of saying they both could have done better by Lisa. To be quite honest, everyone could've done better by Lisa. Not saying that her messing around with David was right, but when you have a good friend like that, you need to rally behind them even in their hard times. It's clear that Lisa was struggling with serious demons, and she was often pushed away, specifically by MJ.

At the funeral, Charles still comes, and the minister shuts MJ down before she can make a major scene. During her eulogy, MJ admits that she and all of us really are constantly pretending that we're okay in life, when we're really not. We're afraid to be honest with each other. "The lies we tell each other are what killed my friend Lisa," Mary Jane said, before opening up about some of Lisa's ugly truths. Mary Jane shockingly states how Lisa's stepfather molested Lisa from the ages 9 to 16, and that she suffered from depression and insecurities. Lisa's mother breaks down, and I don't even think it was because all of this happened to her daughter, but because of the fact that now everyone knows about it. Sad. Though a shocking eulogy, Mary Jane expresses that the best way to celebrate Lisa's life is to tell the truth. She encourages everyone to tell those around them that they are loved, no matter how ugly their truths are.

I posed a question on The Spotlight's Twitter page, asking was Mary Jane wrong for telling Lisa's truth or was it necessary? My goodness, I felt like it was needed, though shocking and awkward at a funeral. Lisa was wrestling with real problems, which ultimately led to her death. If she had talked about it more with others, and people hadn't swept it under the rug or ignored her, she might have still been around. What I love about this show, what I've always loved about this show, is that, even though you're wrapped up in the plot, it discusses real issues that impact us all, especially people of color. It opens the door to have some much needed discussion. This episode had me thinking about mental health and suicide. I have been trying my personal hardest to be more of an open ear to others and more observant and understanding of what they're going through, because life is hard, man. It takes a lot out of you, and, often times, people struggle with problems alone. I don't want to ever miss or ignore signs that someone in my life is seriously struggling, and may need help. I hope you all don't either.

If someone has said something to you about wanting to kill themselves or you are noticing a lot of signs, PLEASE DO NOT sit idly by. Call a doctor, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or try to convince your loved one to go to the hospital immediately and seek help.

Be sure to check out all new episodes of Being Mary Jane at Tuesdays at 10 p.m. ET only on BET. 

Images via BET